A Man REALLY Punished by his Wife

Hi and welcome to my blog.  I decided to start this blog as I have been married for 2 years and in a very unique relationship,.  At first, when I searched the web I found lots of talking about "Domestic Discipline Relationship" where the female is "in charge" and "punishes" her husband.  At first I came to the conclusion that this was exactly the situation that I was in.  However, the more I read and looked into this the more I realized this was not really the case with me.  

I would like to share a few items in our history and then share some stories with you about incidents over the past 2 years.  To be honest, I would love to be able to share my issues and concerns with a therapist but am simply too embarrassed to speak to one in person.  So to start the blog I will just give some random background information then follow up with stories once I know people have discovered this blog and are interested. 

It is hard to say if I am in a "Domestic Discipline" relation or not. From what I have read, those relationships seem to be consensual  I also wouldn't say that I am in a BDSM relationship as those relationship seem to have some sort of sexual component to them. 

What happens to me is that my wife has complete control over me, but it is neither consensual or sexual. She will punish me occasionally with hard, bare bottomed spankings when she feels that I deserve it and she has certain requirements that she demands of me that make me very uncomfortable. I wouldn't say that I feel abused, but I wouldn't say that it is consensual either. I feel really small and helpless when she punishes me this way, I really don't want to be spanked by her, but at the same time, I submit to her because I have grown to see her as the "adult" in the house. I no more want to be spanked then I would presume a child wants to be spanked, but I also feel that I have no choice and can't resist.   

Because of this, the fact that I accept her authority and submit to her discipline I guess in a way I am "consenting" The problem I have with this when reading all the other blogs and stories out there, clearly the couple gets aroused by the discipline and it is clearly part of the sexual bonding of the couple.  That is not the case with me.
  
My spankings are very infrequent as in general I am well behaved (I am adult after all.) but when I mess up, its into our bedroom, pants and underpants down and over her knee for either the back of hairbrush or the ruler. It hurts and I tear up, but I would not call it crying. My spankings average about once a month. I know I have read blogs and groups looking for men in a similar situation as me, but none of them seem to be exactly the same. I am not spanked for sexual arousal.  She claims she needs to punish me because I still act immature and if I misbehave I have no right to refuse her orders to submit to punishment. She says spankings are the ideal punishment as it create a little pain and much embarrassment and since I really hate them they have the desired effect or getting me to change my behavior.  

Again, I take no pleasure in this and get no sexual arousal from it, but reluctantly will do as I am told.  So the only "consent" I am giving is in the fact that I acknowledge that I have screwed up, I am sorry for it, but I don't see why I have to be spanked like a child.  

There are two other things that really bother me. One is, she refuses to allow me to wear boxers and demands that I only wear white fruit of the loom briefs. She claims that they are simply cheaper then boxers (which they are) and that they are better for hygiene in the event that I don't wipe properly. She states that simple white briefs can be bleached which is better for killing any germs on them.  She also states that since we are married I shouldn't be trying to impress anyone with my underwear and that simple white briefs serve well for the intended purpose and that anything else is unnecessary. To be fair she does practice what she preaches.  She wears simple white panties for all the same reasons she makes me wear white briefs.

To be honest, I have no problems with tighty whities and would gladly wear them 99% of the time. The only time I want to be allowed boxers is when I go to my doctor for my annual physical which is taking place in two weeks. I know I am being silly, but the thought of having to strip to my TWs in front of the nurse and doctor is just too embarrassing for me.  It is also the only time when her, no one should see my underwear, argument is invalid. I actually thought about sneaking a pair of boxers into the house then changing into them before I go to the doctor, even if it means finding a public restroom to change in before my appointment.  I should be allowed to wear boxers to my doctor's appointment if I so choose. I understand the cost issue, but what is the big deal of having one pair for the special occasions like this. If I have to wear TWs to please her, I wish she would at least allow me boxers for my physical. I am thinking about asking her for permission to wear the boxers but I am just a little afraid she will say no and if she does then sneaking a pair in might be more difficult.  

The second thing that has me real concerned is next week she will be having a girl friend of hers over. Last time her friend was over I said something I shouldn't have to her. She got annoyed with me and when her friend left she took me upstairs and of course I was spanked. Yesterday, she warned me that if I acted like that again when her friend was over, she was not going to wait for her to leave. Instead she was going to pull my pants and undies down in front of her friend and spank me right then and there. 

Now I have been a nervous wreck since wondering if she really would do it or if it was just a threat to make sure I didn't repeat my childish behavior from the last visit. I certainly have no intention of finding out and she is not one to make up transgressions or excuses to spank me. She does it so infrequently it doesn't look like she is looking for any excuse to spank me. I am sure I will be OK next week, but the thought that somehow this situation would be revealed to another person really scares me. 

I am so confused  I can understand role play as a sexual thing, but that is not what is going on here and I am not sure what to do. I am really worried about having to go to the doctors in my white briefs and I am really worried about her girl friend coming over next week. 

Men reading this board. Does this sound right to you?

Ladies, your taking charge of your husbands is consensual right?  This should be a sex thing between a couple where one is only pretending to be in charge and the other a naughty little boy who needs to be punished    Am I the only one truly under the control of his wife? Would you allow me boxers for my physical? After all, I accept my wife's discipline but what happens in the bedroom should stay in the bed room right?


Now I will be happy to share what happened regarding my physical and what happened when my wife's friend came over, but I would like to know if anyone is reading this yet before I take the time to post an update, so please provide comments as I intend to write this blog to help me deal with the strange life I am living, so all comments are appreciated. 

Thanks for taking the time to read my blog.